Adjusting to my new environment was tough to begin with based solely on the fact that I missed my training family way more than I ever anticipated. Because I am at a site where a previous volunteer served, I thought there might be more ease to adjusting since people in the community are more aware of a foreigner/volunteer. But in my case, being the complete antithesis of the volunteer I replaced has posed more bewildered people, awkward, and intrusive encounters, and constant comparisons than I ever expected. I think my most common occurrence is when I am with one of my students or any other Cambodian person for that matter, and a stranger makes their way up to get the 411 about me. They assume that I have no knowledge of Khmer and proceed to ask the Cambodian with me all sorts of questions about me that I, in turn, respond to. Since people struggle to accept the fact that I am American because of my "s'bpai camoa" or black skin, and they think American means having white skin and blonde hair. Initially, I got a lot of "...you look Indian, Filipino, and even Khmer...." But it wasn't until I was trying to explain to the best of my Khmer language ability that I am African American that they interpreted that I am from Africa just living in America...so now I get lots of questions about Africa "So, how's the weather in Africa? Is it is hot as Kampuchea? Do your mother and father have black skin, too?"...it's quite hilarious but one of the many common conversations.
Money is also always commonly asked about. Status and "face" here are so immersed in this culture, so it's not at all considered inappropriate to inquire a complete stranger, friend, foe, or alien about their income. "How much is the school paying you? America is a rich country, so you must have lots of money...If you dont have much money, then how did you buy that cafe au lait you're drinking?..." LOL, it's okay, because I do. PC said we would have to develop a sense of humor and by how much I expanded mine by living here you would think Katt Williams was my next door neighbor.
Let me not leave out my height and hair. Here I am considered extremely tall, and one of the teachers at school last week cheerfully told me how fat I look. It was quite a compliment, since me appearing bigger means that I'm fed well (and with 3 bowls of rice a day, who wouldn't be? ha ha), in turn making my host family look like gold. People generally have no "in betweens", meaning you're either tall, short, big or fat, etc. So basically if you are not under 5 feet tall (male or female) with a small frame, you are considered a giant. When people see pictures from back in the states they say how pretty I used to be and always ask why I don't straighten my hair. A policeman, not knowing that I speak and understand the language moderately, proceeded to ask a male teacher next to me whether I was a male or female. The shock on his face that I responded was priceless. Actually many inquiring minds will come up to ask all sorts of questions about me right in front of my face assuming I have no knowledge of their language. People here also generally do not introduce themselves, yet they proceed to give you the death stare, the up and down look, and then ask you every personal question they can think of. There are several other things I perceived as highly rude and inappropriate, but I had to just accept as a cultural norm.
Teaching poses many challenges that are unfortunately associated with Cambodian dynamic that has been passed down since the reform of education after the Pol Pot regime. Fortunately, I have found issues that I can feasibly take on and tame as secondary projects. I also have a select few students who I have bonded with tremendously. Teaching at the Wat is a completely different atmosphere than at my school. I really enjoy the time I spend teaching there in my free time, and even go there to study or read on my own because it is a quiet and peaceful place (unless they are chanting or something, which is rare at the times I go daily).
As mentioned before there is too much that happens to be (bad, good, and in between) on a daily basis to capture in this note, but I will say that I have noticed some emotional growth on my own behalf. First off, there have been no tears (and by saying that I hope I won't jinx myself). Also, when things go wrong or unexpectedly or if something happens that is out of this world perplexing have learned to diffuse the situation with a calm mind instead of just getting frustrated. Constantly reminding myself "Welcome to Cambodia" usually does the trick.
